you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
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