airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
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