Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
