therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
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