Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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