worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Randomize