she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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