There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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