He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
