I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Randomize
