Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
