all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
