No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
