and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
