Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
she told me i tasted like america
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
