In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize