I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
