Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
