Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Randomize
