I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
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