Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
