Yo dont text me then not text me
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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