Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
