you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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