Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
