I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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