I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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