Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
