And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize