Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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