it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
You are a genius and a whore.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
