My first STD was from a foam party
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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