Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
