By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
