I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
