is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
