Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
