His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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