There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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