Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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