put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
