You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
you mean i was at the winter classic?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
