I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
