The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize