I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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