i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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