also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
We have so much sex to catch up on
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
