hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
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