she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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