i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
