My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize
